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Lord Of The Rings With Cloud Communications

“…And nine, nine rings were gifted to the race of Men—who above all else, desire power,” said Galadriel. 

Now, what if one of those nine rings came with the power of cloud communication?

Lord of the Rings is considered to be one of the greatest stories ever told. While the setting of Middle-Earth is everything that fans could have asked for, still their imagination knows no boundaries. 

Thus, here we are. Reimagining the story of Frodo Baggins, and how he saved Middle-Earth from the wrath of Sauron. However, our rendition brings a little twist to this evergreen story. 

So, let us dive into the world of LOTR and see what change would cloud communications have brought to this fictional world. 

Isildur might not have lost the ring

At the beginning of the series, we see how King Isildur loses the ring he got from Sauron in the water. It is this unfortunate incident that helps Smeagle secure the ring in the first place. 

But, what if Isildur was connected to the cloud? Could he have contacted Elrond, the half-elven warrior? Could the wielder of Vilya, the most powerful ring among the elves, have helped the King?  

If only they were connected via UCaaS. This would have allowed them to interact with voice, video, or even chat messages and keep Elrond updated about the location of the ring at all times. Thus, when Isildur dies and loses the ring, the elves could have initiated a recon mission to find and destroy it.

The Great Eye could blink

The Great Eye Could Blink

The Great Eye of Sauron was the form taken by the Dark Lord in the third age. Now try to imagine the magnitude of this task on Sauron? Imagine the pressure of tracking everything in Morder.  All this stress—and he couldn’t even blink!

Tracking the activity of over 10,000 soldiers is tough for anyone, no matter how powerful of a dark lord you are. However, it would have been a bit easier if Sauron decided to deploy cloud communications to his aid. He could have tracked the activity of every soldier under his command, that too in real-time.

Additionally, he could have even assigned them different levels of authority. Thus, establishing a chain of command where higher ranking Orcs could watch the foot soldiers below them. Cloud solutions might have even made catching Frodo and Sam that much easier. 

Gates could have been easier to open

Gates Could Have Been Easier To Open

The gates in Middle-Earth never let anyone pass. They always came with a puzzle that not even the smartest being could solve. Even if you were welcomed inside the gates, what’s the point if you cannot pass through?

The gate to the Mines of Moria was equipped with a password too. A puzzle that was solved with the word ‘friend’ in Elvish. And speaking of gates, let us not forget the entrance to the Lonely Mountain where the Dwarves used to live. It would only open at a very specific time during a very specific season. 

Opening the gates in Middle-Earth was tougher than living in Middle-Earth! 

The solution? The cloud, of course! 

It would have been easier to open the gates if they had multi-factor authentication instead of awkwardly easy puzzles. 

And it would make them a lot safer too.

Imagine every high-ranking dwarf receiving an OTP whenever someone requested a password at the gate. No unwanted creature could ever dare enter. Moreover, one would not have to spend hours working out the answer to the puzzles. Just a four-digit pin, and that’s all! 

Additionally, to boost up the security more, they could place different kinds of encryptions. This would make the gates truly impenetrable, like the doors of Gondor, where not even the Grond would be able to enter. 

Why wait for insects to come?

Remember when Gandalf was held captive in Isengard by Saruman? He had to wait for a month to fly in so he could call upon the ‘mighty eagles’. What if the moth didn’t come? Or worse, what if it was eaten by something on the way? Would the message never reach the eagles? 

It is, without a doubt, the most unreliable way to call upon something so important. So, why not deploy a solution that would guarantee your message will reach them instantly?

I present to you the helpline—IVR. Not only will it ease the process significantly, but it is also very easy to remember. With special vanity numbers, you just have to dial 0800-EAGLES, and voila! They are on their way. 

With IVR, the possibilities are endless. You dial 0800-Eagles then select 1 for a single eagle, or 9 for an army. Or another number 0800-Animals. Where you dial 1 for eagles, 2 for bunnies, and 0 for Fellbeasts. You know—the Nazgul dragons. Why leave the bad guys out of the equation, right?

Stop travelling for days just to talk

Stop Travelling For Days Just To Talk

“There is a matter of great concern that needs to be discussed immediately”. Great, why not travel for three whole days just to converse for 15 minutes? 

If only cloud communications were employed, residents of Middle-Earth could have many unnecessary commutes.

Want to talk to someone? Have a video conference. Everyone is available instantly from anywhere around Middle-Earth. They don’t even need the same device as you, their preferred device would work.  Need to pass on some crucial information without revealing yourself? Just use an audio conference. 

I don’t think Rohan had to waste 3 days gathering up an army, going to every kingdom and asking for help if they had just done a conference call. 

Nor would the Wizards have to gather from different locations to discuss a matter that took 5 minutes in total. Middle Earth residents can resort to so many different communication methods and none that require walking for miles. 

Moreover, it’s not like the server is going to be down and the calls won’t connect. Most cloud providers, like Acefone, offer 99.99% uptime, allowing you to make calls 24x7x365. 

One does not simply set up an Orc factory

One Does Not Simply Set Up An Orc Factory

Saruman had set up a factory of Orc for creating soldiers for battle. The factory was destroyed by the Ents in a matter of minutes, but what was worse was that Saruman didn’t have any backup for his research. So much for creating the perfect warrior. 

The cloud may not give you the power of creating your own Orc army, but at least you don’t have to spend your hard-earned money and time on physical set-ups. More importantly, your data will be backed up on multiple servers, so when the Ents come and try to destroy everything, you can get it all back. 

Never mind the fact that turning to the Cloud is a greener option. This would turn the Ents to your side, helping you destroy your competition. 

The beacon of Amon Dîn is…slow

If you are in dire need of help, you would want your message to reach your allies as quickly as possible. While the beacon of Amon Dîn is pretty cool and has a wide range, you wouldn’t say it is the fastest solution out there.

Firstly, it takes 2 men to light the fire at the post. After the fire is seen by the men at the other post, they light their own fire. And so on. In a life and death situation, a process like this can take too long and your allies might not be able to save you. 

However, when we have the power of the Cloud, why bother lighting fires? You can just send all of your allies a voice broadcast and they would immediately know that you are in trouble. You can even customise your message about the kind of trouble you are in and include that in your voice recording. If your allies are not responding to your calls, then you can just send an SMS broadcast. 

Before we destroy the ring…

Cloud communications would bring an interesting twist to the ‘greatest story ever told’. While these technological advancements would help the enemies too, why not give everyone equal opportunities? 

If the Lord of the Rings was set in the current era, the Elves would surely be the ones to develop cloud communication first. Also, the benefits of cloud communication will not be limited to the ones I’ve mentioned. Like I said, with cloud communications, the possibilities are endless!

I wonder if Frodo would even go on an adventure to save Middle Earth. 

While I have spent considerable time making the magical realm of Middle Earth match the current era, if you are looking to get a cloud-based solution for your business and boost your chances against Sauron’s forces, you can get in touch with one of our experts at 1888-859-0450 or just drop us an email at [email protected]

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